The Race that Got Away

On Monday morning, thousands of runners will be toeing the line at the Tufts Health Plan 10k for Women.  It runs through the streets of Boston and surrounding areas, and usually has somewhere around 6,000 registered runners/walkers.  I worked for Tufts Health Plan in Watertown, MA for almost three years.  As an employee of THP, I could have gotten a free entry to the race every year.  But I never did.

Each summer, as registration opened up, I would think to myself, “This is the year!  I’m gonna do it!  I can do it!”  And then I’d hit the treadmill and suffer through two miles, and think, “There’s no way I can run 6.2 miles. Forget it.  I don’t want to embarrass myself.”  Two of my colleagues were in the top 5 male and female finishers every year, and I didn’t want to be compared to them.  I wasn’t a “runner,” whatever that means.

Now, of course, a 10k is totally doable, and I’m absolutely kicking myself for never having done the race when I could have done it for free.  I really regret that I doubted myself so much, that I let fear of failure stop me from doing something I really wanted to do.  It is my goal to someday go back and run that 10k, just to fulfill the dreams of old, non-runner me.  I feel like it would really help me celebrate how far I’ve come with my running–from not being able to even imagine running a 10k to having completed a half marathon, and signing up for another one.  It’s really easy to lose perspective and get caught up in paces and times, and worry about progress and being faster and stronger.  I want to make sure I never lose sight of how amazing it is that I do what I do, regardless of how fast or slow I go.

Tufts Health Plan 10k for Women 2015:  I’m coming for you!

Best race slogan ever

Best race slogan ever

Do you have a race that you’d like to conquer, just to prove you can?

Who wants to run this one with me??

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20 thoughts on “The Race that Got Away

  1. Brittany says:

    I know this feeling, I had been doing it to myself for 10 years! But yay for us, for finally shaking the doubt and getting it done!!
    My prove-it-to-myself race is this Sunday, the Chicago Marathon! We’ll see how that goes ;0)

  2. SuzLyfe says:

    Hmmmm. I’ve never thought about that. There is part of me that would like to get another go at the Charlottesville half, because I got sick right before. But on the other hand, I got mine back the next weekend when I did my own half, haha.

    • DarlinRae says:

      Well there ya go! This is the only race I have these feelings about simply because I was presented with the opportunity over and over, and wanted to do it, but was too scared.

  3. greenmountainlife says:

    Oh man been in this rut as well, I always wanted to run this one half in Knoxville but never trusted myself enough to be able to run such a hilly course. It will be completed one day though, that is a definite! As for a Tufts 10K, I’ve learned to never turned down a weekend in Boston 😉

  4. dgobs says:

    The Tufts 10K is a race my “runner” friends always did and I remember it always sounded so long and scary (10K! That’s more than 6 miles! OMG!). I just looked at the course and it goes right by my work! If you do it next year I’ll totally do it with you! 🙂

    I want to say that the half I have coming up at the end of the month is my “I want to conquer it just to prove I can!” race but I’m not so sure about the conquering part of it. I’d love to go back and try one of my first 5Ks over to see if I can do them faster and stronger than I did the first time around.

    • DarlinRae says:

      Let’s do the Tufts 10k next year!!!!

      And I have every confidence that you will finish your half marathon and be awesome. And then you can always go back and do it better next time 🙂

      • dgobs says:

        Yesss let’s do it!!

        And thanks 🙂 If it doesn’t go great, then I’ll just have a really low bar set that I can beat next time!

  5. veryrach says:

    I love your title, The Race that Got Away. Lol! It’s so great that you can look back to your old self and say what was I thinking? How dare I doubt myself! It’s such a good attitude to have! Never doubt yourself! You can really do anything you want to!

  6. irishrunnerchick says:

    It’s always nice to go back and kick some ass! I never managed to run a race while still living in Ireland and they have an awesome summer race series 5K->marathon so I figure someday I’ll have to arrange a visit home to coincide with one of those.

  7. Kimberley@Black Dog Runs Disney says:

    I’m all over the regret thing! I regret not getting the dupa out of bed my last day in SF and running down the Wharf and back. But I see it as the top of the list of things to do on the return trip, whenever that may be. At least you don’t have to fly over 3,000 miles to make up for your momentary lapse of no self-confidence! You will rock it!

  8. txa1265 says:

    You can do it!

    It really is pretty silly how we allow ourselves to get in our own way … for me, in spite of having my 25th anniversary of running this year, it was only in 2012 at 46 years old that I even ran my first 5k! Yeah, I totally held myself back! But you can’t go back, might as well keep moving forward!

    • DarlinRae says:

      Wow, I didn’t realize you started racing so late in your running “career.” Brains are funny things. It’s amazing how much they can mess with their people!

  9. piratebobcat says:

    I wish I lived closer, I’d totally come run it with you! When I registered for my first marathon, I had never raced further than a 5k. It was terribly painful, but when I finished, I knew I could do anything! Just like you can!

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